Win Your Weekends

Welcome back to another episode of how to twenty-something with today’s topic being about winning your weekends

And don’t worry, I’ll be running through what this phrase even means, how you can apply it to your life, and the role it plays on creating balance in your life

You see, one of the biggest things I see amongst young adults is this aggressive swing from week day life to weekend life where your weekday is structured and regimented and your weekends all hell breaks loose, and while it’s important to have fun it’s also important to have balance

It’s one the major outcomes my clients walk away with by working with me and once they establish this healthy relationship of give and take, of thinking with your future self in mind, of having a clear idea of what your decisions right now will have on some future version of you, they actually start loving all aspects of their life – funny how that works

I honestly don’t think people even understand what this idea of balance really is

Because you might be listening and thinking yeah I have a good balance

But if you’re like the 90% of twenty-somethings out there, then I hate to break it to you but you don’t have good balance, if you’re part of the 10% then congrats you’re doing great and keep it up and mind you this is a stat I completely made up but is pretty accurate to the people I know and interact with

There’s also the phrase work-life balance that likes to be thrown around in the younger millennial older gen z generations which is also falsely defined and not at all what you’re saying it is

I hear people take work life balance in one of two wrong directions

The first one is working less and playing more.. These people believe they should not have to work 40 hours a week because that takes up too much of their life to enjoy the fun parts of it

They feel entitled to leave work early or come in as they feel when they are still at the bottom of the totem pole of the corporate ladder, or they feel inclined to complain about their schedule

I get it, because college makes you feel like you have all this free time and flexibility and the real world makes you feel like you’re in prison of be here for work, eat at this time, and play for a very small fraction of your day

Unfortunately, that is just not how life works, at least not in this present day – and trust me, I’m for a shorter a work week or being self-employed if you found a passion that can support your lifestyle

But I also know a majority of you don’t have it in you to run your own shit because it’s a lot of freaking work, it requires an unbelievable amount of discipline, organization, and mental health; and it is much safer and more responsible to have a secure paycheck coming your way

But that also means going to work Monday through Friday and being gone for 10 hours at a time

It’s not fun, I know because I had a corporate job and I set myself up to be able to leave it as quickly as I could after finding my passion with personal training and coaching

The other version of work/life balance that people get all twisted is saving all of the fun for your weekends so it’s the stark contrast of weekday you compared to weekend you – your priorities, your decisions, and your actions

Here’s what work/life balance actually is.. It is having a set routine all seven days of the week… having a solid foundation in your fitness regimen, your nutritional choices, your mental health, your growth mindset, and your finances SO THAT you can go to that networking event on a weekday or splurge a little on the weekends and party hard every now and then

Not every weekend or every weeknight but a nice back and forth where you know you can come right back to your routine the very next day or very next moment

It’s having the same say top 5 priorities at the top of your mind at all times.. Not just because it’s the weekday or because it’s the weekend

But because it’s what makes you feel good and like you have your shit together

I’ve said this in past episodes and I’m saying it again and will continue to remind you of it, but your solid foundation is your home base it’s the place for you to come back to, reset yourself, get back into your rhythm and then be able to take a detour every now and then

Balance is tricky because, just like the laws of physics, every action has an equal or opposite reaction

As in every decision you make or action you take affects some future version of you and it’s up to you as to how you pay for those consequences or reap in those achievements

Balance in your everyday life can show up in a number of ways, but let’s begin with what balance isn’t in terms of winning your weekends

Balance is not an extremely regimented routine monday through thursday and then go off the rails friday through sunday only to repeat that process again

Balance is also not staying out to close every weekend, drinking every weekend, eating out every weekend, ignoring all responsibilities every weekend

And by every I mean a majority of your weekends

Balance is not being alcohol free 6 days a week but that one night where you aren’t you have 7 plus drinks and wake up hungover

Similarly balance is not eating well 6 days a week and going ham on your one cheat day, which I even work hard to help my clients remove the cheat day mindset from their vocabulary because it is toxic

It’s where the saying, everything in moderation, comes into play

Balance is moderation

If you were to seriously take a step back and look at every weekend you’ve had in say the last two months, how many of those included you drinking alcohol, sleeping in very late, not eating well, and honestly just trying to feel like you’re back in college again to some extent

You see, there’s great maturity that happens when you realize you don’t want to spend your weekends doing all of that but would rather have more enticing activities, more meaningful moments, and healthier decisions

Something I’ve battled with over the last few years is the idea that maturity is boring and I will say it is boring when comparing my life right now to my 21 year old self, but I’m also not the same person that I was in college

Life took its toll on me from the moment I walked across the stage to collect my diploma and it forced me to put a lot of things into perspective

I had to very quickly learn about my mental health, my routine, my coping mechanisms for a rough day or phase in my life, what my priorities were, managing my finances so I could afford rent and groceries, and what life after college really is

The pandemic got me out of drinking and going out because everything was shut down and I didn’t find it helpful to drink alone in my apartment and I kind of just carried that habit with me for the following years, including now

Maturing is knowing myself and not wanting to have an expensive night out that I barely remember and then suffer the hangover consequences the next day

Maturing is also knowing that now I don’t like to put myself in jet lag mode, where I’m staying up late and sleeping in on the weekends where my weekday schedule is like a 3 hour difference in what time I go to bed and wake up

I mentioned this in the sleep episode where it’s the equivalent of flying from florida to california only it’s really just you in your city going out friday and saturday night and staying out late

Which funny enough, as I’m recording this episode, this morning in one of my group fitness classes, one of the members told me she was exhausted because she did have to fly to california for 48 hours and two days later she’s still trying to adjust her circadian rhythm

And I told her isn’t it funny how people do this to themselves every single weekend but without the trip to the west coast

And I don’t want you to think I’m shitting on the bar culture, but I am shitting on your decisions to take part in it every single weekend or again, more weekends than not

And I know so so so many people that are stuck in their 22 year old life but are pushing 30 now, which is sad and pathetic

I know that’s harsh but come on, when is it enough, when is it time for you to grow up and find something else to do other than drinking every weekend

There’s more to life when you think about what else there is to do with your friends or even with yourself

And you’ll actually find yourself happier because now your weekdays align with your weekend schedule and priorities, you’ll even find yourself showing up in your relationships stronger, in your work environment stronger, and in your health stronger

You’re going to end up feeling better and looking better

Basically, here’s what I’m not saying: that you need to be so dialed in 24/7 and never have a fun carefree moment again for the rest of your life

Because that my friend, is also called imbalance

Just like how your extremes are from your weekday to weekend, going all in on one end is just as bad for you

There is a little dance that happens with your choices as it’s a give and take

It’s have the foresight to know and prepare for the outcomes of your actions and deciding if it’s worth it

Because sometimes it is

Sometimes you’re going to have to a weekend away or a wedding to attend or some celebration to occur where letting loose is the healthier decision

But having that routine to come back to is what will make your life easier

But let’s switch the focus to the title of the episode: win your weekends as this is a play on maintaining a balanced lifestyle

I do want to give credit where credit is due and that is I did not come up with this term – I listen to a health and fitness podcast called mindpump and one of the guys, Adam, brings this idea up every now and then

And I for one love it

I love it so much that I’m creating an entire episode for you to apply it to your life

So let me break down what winning your weekends means or at least my interpretation of it and how it applies to us twenty-somethings

This is going to bed at a decent time Friday and Saturday night, not letting yourself sleep in past a certain time in the morning and actually getting up out of bed when you wake up instead of scrolling on your phone or watching tv from your under your covers for several more hours

This is not skipping meals for whatever reason, but eating all three meals per usual, hitting your protein targets, figuring out when you’re going to exercise, and set yourself up for the week ahead

Go grocery shopping, meal prep in whatever style you choose to, do laundry if needed, straighten up your place

Basically winning your weekends means prioritizing getting your shit together so you’re not a monster dragging your feet come Monday morning

I want to help you avoid the feeling of ‘fuck me’ when your alarm goes off on Monday because you chose to be a careless twenty-something year old all weekend long and didn’t do anything for the adult version of you that is required during the work week

It also means, knowing when you’re going to do what needs to get done so you can go have fun knowing that everything is taken care of or will be taken care of in a timely manner

That’s the balance

You can’t escape responsibilities, our parents aren’t taking care of us anymore, we are in charge of ourselves and with that comes errands that need to get done whether you want to do them or not

There are greater consequences when you choose not to do the adult decision and go have fun instead

And it’s the weekday version of you that suffers for weekend you having too much fun, resulting in this viscous rinse and repeat cycle of a rough and exhausting work week, so your reward to yourself is kicking it back on the weekends and living freely

It’s a form of self sabotage because you’re required to be so regimented five days of the week so you want the complete opposite come Saturday and Sunday and don’t worry next week’s episode I already know is going to be on self-sabotage

The mind pump podcast has also brought up some really good points that this idea of living freely is a result of being regimented, responsible, and disciplined

What this means is, having a fit and healthy body, a clear mind, and consistency in the ways your show up for yourself allows you to have the freedom, flexibility, and energy to do what you want

Maybe you’ve had the thought before that ‘wow I do so much during the workday and the days feel really long yet I feel like I can’t do more than one task on each weekend day’

Well it’s most likely because you worked out and ate well so now you have the energy to do multiple tasks because energy begets energy

When you lounge around all weekend you don’t have the energy to get up and do what you need to do and throw in your messed up sleep cycle to the mix and you have a recipe for no motivation

Yet you have enough energy for another night out.. Funny how that works

It’s because you have just enough energy for what you’re prioritizing and that my friend is your drinking habit and social life

Where if you worked out before say lunch time on both saturday and sunday, then you would have the energy to clean your place, prep your food, AND go out and have fun, but also not wanting to get shitfaced because you want to wake up the next day and show up for yourself and your health again because it ‘s what makes you feel good

That’s where balance hits

Because it is possible to do it all with none of the extremes

I actually believe it is more beneficial to take a rest day during your work week than during your weekends because your work week already has this structure to it and the weekends are more of a free for all 

And when you don’t have a set routine or at least checklist of weekend tasks it becomes a lot harder to get shit done

If you are of the young adult population who doesn’t have a normal schedule, whether because you’re in school or you work strange hours like a nurse then this still applies to you only if you’re a nurse then it’s your days off that should include all of your errands, exercise, and prep for your shifts

Because your work days are really long and it’s not fair to you or your body to workout on those days or have to worry about food for the next day

I put my nurse clients on a 2 or 3 day a week full body workout and specifically tell them not to workout on the days they have work

For anyone who is in school, my biggest piece of advice for fitting in the gym with your changing schedule it to treat your workout like it’s another class

It’s not going to be at the same time every day, but take a look at your schedule and see where you have enough time to workout and shower

But this episode is for the majority of twenty-somethings who have a monday through friday schedule, I just wanted to exemplify how you can always apply this mentality of winning your weekends to your unique schedules – where weekend for you probably doesn’t mean Friday night through Sunday 

And you direct the mentality I’m about to introduce to your days off whether they are consecutive days off or not

So the best way to win your weekends is to identify your top four or five priorities and plug them into your weekend BEFORE Friday night hits 

Knowing when and how you’re going to show up in these different parts of your life – basically having your schedule set to include them before your weekend festivities begin 

It’s on you to hold yourself accountable to your actions, or you could always hire a coach like myself to help you actually want to show up for yourself

Where your routine becomes what you crave the most

My top priorities are sleep, nutrition, physical health, financial responsibility, my business, and meaningful connections

I have six that are extremely important to me to maintain to my highest ability

That means for my sleep, I’m letting myself rest on the weekends when I don’t have to be working at one of the gyms, this is not in a lazy way, but in a strategic planned out way

For example, before I go to bed Friday night I have a time I want to be asleep by – which adjusts if I have plans but still have a goal time, and what time I want to be up by

I also determine whether I’m going to let myself lounge in my bed for an extra 20 minutes and scroll on my phone – this does not happen every Saturday and Sunday but sometimes when I’ve had a crazy week – doing this serves me best

I still make sure I get out of bed, make my bed, and have my morning routine but I do let myself lounge a little bit more than usual every now and then

My nutrition, I’m prioritizing protein and three meals every day – my nutrition doesn’t change all that much from weekday to weekend only I don’t have pre-prepped lunches ready to go so it’s having meat defrosted and in the fridge by Friday night

My nutrition also is planning out when I’m going to go grocery shopping and when I’m going to meal prep for the week ahead

I usually spread them out where I grocery shop on Saturday and meal prep on Sunday

Physical health for me is easy.. I’m either group training at the gym which has me doing farmers carries for like 45 minutes or I go lift on my own or if the weather’s nice I play soccer at a park nearby

But again prior to friday night I know what’s happening with my physical fitness saturday and sunday

Financial responsibility is not going ham and spending money on food and drinks and things all weekend

When I had a steady corporate paycheck i would splurge on one meal out a weekend

Now I do one experience a weekend that sometimes is free and sometimes is low cost like less than 30 dollars

In my business, I spend my mornings in my weekend planning podcast episodes or upcoming workshops or the week ahead and what needs to get done or created and on Sundays I usually write all of my clients workouts for the week and update their folders

And my sixth priority is meaningful connection so I try my hardest to do something social on Saturday or even Friday night but at least one thing that involves quality time with good people

Do you see how some of my priorities do include the fun parts of the weekend without being reckless and irresponsible?

I don’t typically stay out past midnight in general, I call it my Cinderella era, and it’s because I don’t want to sleep in too late the next day.. I like being productive in the morning

But that’s me and that’s how I win the weekend about 98% of the weekends in the year

How you win the weekend is entirely up to you and like anything that’s new, start with really focusing your priorities on one specific area in your life and build it up from there

When you put yourself first you then become capable of being there for others and having fun at the same time

But a large part of adulting is being responsible first.. Doing what you know needs to get done so then it’s one less thing you have to worry about and one less thing for your monday self to have to stress over

Winning your weekends makes weekday life a hell of a lot more manageable

If this is something you struggle with and need help adjusting into then please go to the show notes and click the let’s chat link as I would love to strategize with you

Otherwise this concludes another episode of how to twenty-something

If you liked what you heard.. You know the drill share it with a friend, post it on social media and tag me when you do, send it to that reckless person in your life as I’m sure you know exactly who needs to hear this message

And thank you for listening.. I can’t wait to be in your headphones again with another episode next week